


Maybe there's a reason to believe you'll be okay

by Wanderer_im_Sternenmeer



Series: You will be found [1]
Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Emotional Baggage, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, I wrote this in summer and it shows, Introspection, M/M, Pre-Slash, android abuse mentioned, barely beta we die like nonbinaries, it ain't much but it's honest work, like really not fitting wintertime AT ALL, that and open talk about feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-21
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:40:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,196
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28227033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wanderer_im_Sternenmeer/pseuds/Wanderer_im_Sternenmeer
Summary: After everything that happened to them, it's hard to believe that things actually got better. Sometimes, the contrast between past and present can get overwhelming. Ralph finds out that he is not the only one struggling.
Relationships: Jerry(s) & Ralph (Detroit: Become Human), Jerry(s)/Ralph (Detroit: Become Human), Kara & Luther & Alice Williams (Detroit: Become Human), Kara/Luther (Detroit: Become Human) mentioned if you squint
Series: You will be found [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2067756
Comments: 2
Kudos: 7





	Maybe there's a reason to believe you'll be okay

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Schreibmaschine](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Schreibmaschine/gifts).



> Nothing particularly remarkable, just me humbly sliding @Schreibmaschine (y'all head over there for some amazing dbh writing) a pronoun couple one-shot I started this summer as an (early) little Christmas present. Thank you for all the times your writing made my day!

“Jerry?”  
Ralph was having an almost surprisingly good time at their garden party. Kara had decided to celebrate their first summer as a family and invited their friends and neighbours over and despite the crowd, the battered android was still calm because nobody was hostile, they were all happy and content and besides, he was around his family who would always keep him safe. Luther made sure there was enough flavoured Thirium for their android guests while Kara, more experienced with cooking, took care of the barbeque for the humans while Jerry was everywhere managing the music, chatting to people, getting things from inside the house. At first, only the Jerry who had crossed the border with Kara, Luther and the little one had been part of the family. Today, nine of the Jerrys who had survived the death camp with Ralph had taken him with them to reunite with the other androids.  
Ralph had not dared to hope for a warm welcome after he had yelled at and threatened Alice, but instead he had been accepted as though he had always been there, Kara and Luther treating him with gentle kindness and Alice excitedly showing him around the house they were currently sharing with the family of Rose, the first human who was friendly to Ralph. Though they did mention plans to organise their living situation sometime soon, maybe getting a new place. After all, ten new housemates would be too much to handle in the long run. But they had told Ralph not to worry about the future and enjoy the evening, so he took a look around and did just that.  
Just a few steps away, one Jerry sat with Alice and her friends from school, a flower crown on their head and animatedly telling them a story, waving the arm that was not a splintered stump around to emphasise a point, earning a giggle from the children. Jerry’s units had gone a long time without repairs in an environment that was not good for their biocomponents, which meant that almost none of them were without damage of some kind. Still, none of them seemed concerned about that and each unit stuck to the tasks it was fit to do, so the hivemind was still overall functioning well and thriving on the happiness of those around them. Ralph himself was always anxious around children. Even though he had not been hurt by one, he was afraid of them scaring him somehow and him hurting them. For Ralph, fear tended to turn into anger and when he was angry, he sometimes did very bad things. And he knew that he had to be quite scary to look at, so keeping to the sidelines of the party and just observing was better. But Jerry was so happy that they were like the sun to Ralph. Bright, radient, beautiful, but it hurt something inside Ralph to look at them. Still, he did not want to imagine a life without Jerry. Maybe that made Ralph like a plant? He almost hoped so, he loved plants very much. Hopefully the new house would have a garden for him to tend to. His family would certainly like to have a garden and he would make it the most beautiful one of all. A garden for the home where he would love with his family. The thought filled him with so much happiness that some poured out of him as a giggle and a small jump. Yes, everything would be wonderful. Perhaps he could already start planning? He wondered what his family's favourite flowers were. After all, he could guess but knowing what plants would delight them most would be a good way to begin.  
He looked around, seeing that Luther, Kara and Alice were talking to other people at the moment and Ralph did not want to interrupt them for something that could wait until later. But maybe he could find a Jerry unit who was not busy at the moment. There was the storyteller, one was painting children's faces and the Jerry with the leg that was starting to lock up from time to time was dancing with Rose and he counted six more bustling around. One was missing. The unit had to be somewhere in the house and Ralph immediately went looking. The kitchen and the living room were empty, so the android ventured up the stairs where the various guest rooms were located. Ralph stood in front of the room Alice had pointed out as Jerry’s and knocked, remembering that this was what humans did when they were polite.  
“Jerry?”, he called, carefully. No answer. Perhaps Jerry might not have been in there, but if they were, they had not told Ralph to go away. Following that logic, Ralph pushed the door open, disappointment sinking in when the room was empty. Just as he was about to close the door, he noticed that the window was open. Copying something he had seen Kara do, he went to close it, which was when he spotted a familiar figure out on the roof next to it.  
“Is something wrong, Jerry?” At that, the other android flinched, a hand coming up to wipe at their cheeks before turning to Ralph, trademark radiant smile in place.  
“Hello, Ralph! Sorry, we thought there were enough units in the garden for now. Did you need something?” All of a sudden, favourite flowers seemed far less important in that moment. Instead he placed his feet on the box under the window and carefully pulled himself out so he was sitting on the roof, too. He made sure to have Jerry to his right, so it would be easier to look at them with his functioning eye. The placement was also more convenient for the Jerry unit, who was blind and damaged on the right side of their face. Ralph could not help but think how they matched, even though only he was as broken inside as much as on the outside.  
A small lie would not hurt.  
“Ralph needed a break from the people. They are very friendly and he does not feel threatened, but it is all a bit...”  
“Much?”, Jerry asked, tugging their legs up and leaning their chin on the knees. They chuckled when they saw the surprised look on Ralph's face. „We were alone for months without any hope. Even though we never wanted anything more than an evening like this, it's almost overwhelming to actually be here. Sending one unit out of sight to de-stress helps elevating the emotional pressure.“  
Was that a kind way to tell Ralph to go? But no, Jerry had just said how lonely they used to be. And Jerry had taught Ralph that talking could help sort out feelings. So he remained where he was, hoping to help by listening.  
“It's ironic now, but we would all have died, if the soldiers had not collected us. A lot of Jerrys died during the attack and in the camps, but we had been dying long before that. The park was not bringing in enough money and one day the owners were just gone. We had never known anything else and where would 150 identical units go? So we stayed, kept the park as best in working order as we could. Maybe one day the humans would come back to be happy there again. And humans came, only they...“ Jerry’s voice died down, one hand unconsciously trailing its fingers over the scar. Ralph had noticed that it looked a bit different from his own burn damage, more like it was scraped open by an object. He had always assumed it to be the result of an accident, but now he wondered with dawning horror how many of the Jerrys' wounds had come from humans just like the ones that had hurt Ralph. And Jerry had so many more bodies. Ralph did not want to say anything and he was not used to comforting. Instead he decided to place a hand in Jerry’s shoulder. The other barely seemed to notice, staring into the distance and continuing like they did not know how to stop now that they started.  
„When winter began, less of them came, but things didn't get better. Having almost no shelter from the cold… we were freezing over, shutting down one by one. We had to give up most of our work on the park, only kept one ride working because we had to do something. It was our job to look after the park. Doing anything was always better than doing nothing and giving up. Then Alice came with Kara and Luther… we hadn't seen a little girl for so long, we almost couldn't believe our luck. When we saw how sad she looked, we finally knew what to do again. The one ride we managed to save was meant for her. For the child who needed us most. And seeing her smile made us the happiest we had ever been. We knew we would be gone soon, but in that moment, we made our peace with it. We were not afraid anymore, because she was not. One last time, we managed to take someone's worries away for one moment. We were content. When they travelled on, we had to stay behind. We were still too many to join them and we were scared of what would happen if we split the group. But soon after, the soldiers came. They shot the Jerrys who tried to run and forced the others into a truck. It was obvious they were going to hurt us and we knew that at least one of us would have to survive, no matter what. So for the first time, one of us went away from the group. And in the camp, they put us all in different areas. Being separated physically wasn't the bad part, it was basically still just being in different places at the same time, we were being destroyed and waiting to be destroyed and trying to cross the border. At least one of us had a chance, no matter how slim. We remembered Alice and were ready for the end. But then, again, it did not come. You remember how the camp was saved and they recognised androids as people. And now, after everything is over, we are here. We are here after we were so certain to die so many times. After cold and loneliness, we are here in summer and amongst a new family.“ Jerry's voice shook with static and Ralph felt the body beneath his hand tremble.  
„After we thought we would lose everything, we gained more than we ever dared to dream we'd have. People say how fragile happiness is, but we feel like ours could break us. So… yes, we understand that even just a garden party can be too much. It feels like any moment something terrible will happen again and we can't-“ Deviancy brought many ways for their mechanical bodies to show emotion, often baffling scientists. For example, cooling water used to keep the optical processing units from overheating was known to spill out in some cases when deviants were experiencing intense emotions, thus resembling tears.  
“Sorry. You, you really didn’t need to listen to all this.”, Jerry sniffed while wiping the water away. “We got, this, we... just need a moment.” And maybe this could have been seen as a signal to leave the Jerry alone so they could regain their composure. But Ralph did not want it to be. Because Jerry had been there for him countless times, always ready to sit with him after nightmares, flashbacks and bad episodes. Always smiling and kind and patient. Never asking for anything in return. And even though they were not asking right now, perhaps _because_ they almost seemed not to dare ask, Ralph was overwhelmed by the urge to give. He knew he was awkward, broken and scary to look at, but he still wanted to help, to pass on some of the comfort that had been given to him. It seemed like he was not the only one who had to get used to the idea for people caring for oneself.  
“Ralph heard that hugs help people feel better. Would Jerry like one?” Ralph knew he was getting better, but he was still skittish when it came to touching. Alice carefully grabbing his hand, Kara placing a comforting hand on his knee… nothing was allowed to come near his face, nothing he did not see coming beforehand and nothing too much or too long. Still, no one pushed him and everyone encouraged him whenever he initiated a shy touch. A hug had always seemed too much and too close, but now he wanted to give one to the best friend he had in the world. While he still belonged to the family, he was not a part of Father, Mother and the Little Girl. It did not hurt at all with Jerry in the same position as him. “Uncles”, Alice called them and Ralph had found that he could be very happy with that indeed.

**Author's Note:**

> Maybe you noticed the "Dear Evan Hansen" quotes in the title of this work and this series? I hope to continue this series and then you will find out more about it.


End file.
